Take a Stand

In the Grassroot Soccer Skillz curriculum, at the beginning of every practice we ask the kids to take a stand. We say a statement and ask the kids to either agree or disagree with that statement and then explain their position on the issue. An example of a statement would be “In my culture it I okay for boys to have more and one girlfriend as long as they use a condom.” Eight years ago I took my very own stand of a slightly different nature. A stand against alcohol and drugs through a pact I made with my best friend at the time saying that we would never drink or do drugs. At some point we both fell off that bandwagon, hers was a far deeper fall than mine which lasted about 2 months in total, but I renewed that pledge and retook my stand the day before my sweet sixteen birthday party 6, almost 7 years ago now. For some reason, all that information got through to me and I realized that my health and my passion for a sport (that I know no longer play, but still uphold to utmost respect for) far outweighed what alcohol and drugs were ever going to give me.

Today, as I was completing the blog in which I explained how I question the work that I am doing and the program that we are using, I got some truly tragic news. 2-time winner of ESPN’s Academic All-American and a personal friend of mine passed away yesterday. Kyle Conrad, a 21-year old business and sports management student, and I haven’t had all that much interaction since we both moved on from our TCU travel soccer days, but that doesn’t mean that it was not entirely crushing to hear this news. Though he was a year or two younger than me, I spent a lot of time with him and his teammates because I practiced with them on the nights that I was not practicing with the girls, I traveled to London with him and all of our fellow teammates when I was 15, and I cheered on his high school soccer team as they crushed my own boys high school team. He, along with Edvin, a mutual friend and teammate, were nearly unstoppable together, and two of the best soccer players the state of Florida has seen.

What was even more distressing for me, aside from the fact that I am currently in Africa unable to attend the funeral, is the way that he died. According to an article in the Palm Beach Post, he fell off a bridge in Fort Lauderdale around 2:30 in the morning. While no cause of death has been stated, one can make a fair share of assumptions that may be true or not true as to what he was doing crossing a railroad bridge at 2:30 a.m. While I pass no judgments and truly mourn the world’s loss of yet another incredible young man, I urge you to look back a blog or two at the statistics about Substance Abuse and review my personal interaction with drugs and alcohol at the collegiate level. I believe that in our youth, we really do believe that we are invincible, that nothing will happen to us, but it can, it does, and it will. Sometimes we really need to wake up and smell the coffee; we need to face that fact that there are consequences for our actions.

While some of what I am saying might sound heartless or soulless in this moment, I cried for the first time today in what seems like forever. The role that substance abuse a played in my life and the people that it has hurt is huge. So I am using right now the only possible place I have to voice my opinion and try to evoke a conversation, to get someone to seriously consider the other side of what seems like harmless fun in the moment. Again I have no idea, if alcohol or drugs were involved in this situation, but either way I am finally stating to the world how I feel.

If the world is going to take someone like Kyle Conrad from us, we are going to learn something from it and his death will not just be a loss, but a light. I am begging and pleading that next time you head out on the town, you take just a moment and think about your goals, your dreams, all of the things that you are capable of in this world, and take a stand for Kyle’s life and so many others who have lost lives because of alcohol and drug abuse. Whether you are taking a stand not to drink and drive, not to drink in excess, or not to drink at all is up to you, but it is time that we all try to take action.